Take a read and tell me what you think - do you agree its goin' to the dawgs or you're quite happy with this season's talents and changes (Ellen for Paula, Simon leaving, Kara upping the colour bar on her spray tan etc.)
The End of American Idol
Oh what has become of American Idol season nine?
We’d rather watch the drying of paint or turpentine.
Is that this season is awful, it just straight up sucks.
Kind of makes us wish we didn’t have to see your face.
But all you’ve done is make us miss crazy Paula Abdul.
Your face bears no expression other than that scowl.
You’re now more orange than an Oompa-Loompa man.
Not much more we can say other but: TMI, TMI, TMI.
What will we do now the headband-maker is gone?
She annoyed us just like that Bachelor loser Tenley.
Everyone’s pitchy and off, in need of decongestant.
No more Gavin DeGraw, Temptations, or Alicia Keys.
Is to watch our favorite indie gal, Crystal Bowersox.
After Crystal sang we fell asleep and were snoring.
Was Larry Platt’s rendition of “Pants on the Ground.”
We declare, American Idol, that you’ve jumped the shark.
-Betty's Poet Laureate-
Just knowing Ellen Degeneres was coming on the show was enough to whet my appetite for this season of AI. I sat thru countless weeks of prelim auditions (just as you have), to finally get to Hollywood week where she made her debut. So has she fallen short of expectations? imo, a little. But I don't blame her entirely. A friend and I were discussing this (as we always do in the middle of the night) and we figured, Ellen just doesn't have enough airtime to be 'Ellen'. She seems 'restrained' and also imo, 'strained'. Maybe she's trying to be a credible judge (cracking jokes every two points does not a credible judge make), maybe she can see the producer doing the 'wrap it up' sign from the corner of her eye, maybe she's (highly unlikely but anything's possible) nervous. Whatever it is, Ellen on Idol isn't really ELLEN on Idol. I liked it better when she would critique performances on her lil single sofa on her show.
Still early days yet. Practice makes perfect, maybe she'll up her game at the Spectaculars.
8 girls will be singing their hearts out tonight ... my fingers are crossed for Didi. (I'm assuming Crystal, Lilly, Siobhan, Katelyn and Katie are shoo-ins.)
xoxo, s.
ps. Fyi, the term "jumped the shark" means a show has hit its high already and is now heading downhill.
AI9 has been #FAILing so hard. Overall, the live performances have been lackluster (borderlining painful-to-watch for the most part). I'm not gonna be watching it anymore. PS: Tim Urban needs to go.
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